To Pluto and back…
If this were a blog, where I could have been sure that people who know me in real life will not be coming to read, I could have disclosed shocking secrets here today. Simply because I feel like sharing today – sharing little bits of information about myself that actually mean something and not the random facts which carry little or no value to me or to the reader.
But you see, the only people who visit this blog are actually people who know me in person. If any of you thinks that he or she is the only person who gets an sms to go read my blog and leave an interesting comment about how interesting you found the current post, give yourself a pat on the back for being in tune with reality. If any of you thinks I don’t know who sends those text messages, please know today that you are not as smart as you think as you are, or you do not realize how smart I think I am.
I am perfectaly aware that as soon as I am done writng one of my masterpieces, a mutitude of faces (all of four) lights up simultaneously across the globe. There is empirical data which the Martians have provided to Burmese space technology association (BSTA), which suggests that at particular times – which co-incide perfectly with the timings of my updates – flashes of light have been seen coming out of four different sectors of Earth, and that these flashes of light correspond with hightened siesmic activity across the globe, and miraculous altering of the earth’s magnetic field, which has had far reaching consequences, literally speaking, for our Solar System. Apparently, every surge in the electro-magnetic activity has had a spinning effect on Pluto, the farthest planet (erstwhile) of the solar system. So much so that it began to resemble a dog chasing its own tail albiet in a much larger orbit, which the Martians maintain was the primary reason behind IAU – International Astronomical Union’s decision to exclude poor Pluto from the list of planets. The IAU maintained that Pluto was too eccentric. The Martians and the BSTA believe that Pluto has been a victim of circumstances beyond its control – circumstances that are, in their Martian words translated into Burmese, quite possibly a direct product of the exceedingly suspicious activities which are set rolling when a certain blog is updated. The text messages that the four of you send to each other are only the tip of the iceberg, and the icerberg is on Pluto.
It was in part for Pluto’s sake, and in part out of a very real fear of a Martian invasion via Burma of my house that I had decided to refrain from updating. But apparently, my not updating is not helping poor Pluto in any way, and IAU refuses to reconsider its decision. These unions and panels are often quite bizzare, aren’t they?
Take, for instance, the toothless ICC. More than two years after that Darrel Hair fiasco unfolded in Oval, when the English cricket team were awarded a test match which they quite certainly would have lost without Darrel Hair’s unfortunate intervention, they continue to try and make up their mind whether to play fair and call it a draw or give in to Darrel Hair’s Australia and call it forfeited.
These bodies never seem to be able to make up their minds. And they seldom do the right thing.
So, I am going to get back to updating. Now if this were a blog which were not read by people who know me in person, I would have disclosed some shocking secrets about myself here today, but as matters stand….
“the only people who visit this blog are actually people who know me in person” . . . liar! LIAR! *points finger accusingly* now, please, shock away.
baji
February 6, 2009 at 7:50 pm
Baji: This changes the situation fundamentally. I have two options: either to replace ‘the only’ with ‘almost all the’ or reveal shocking secrets.
I choose the latter:
Shocking secret #1: Cascading failure in power transmission can be detrimental to sustained shocking.
knicq
February 7, 2009 at 3:11 pm
I hope soon Maxwell’s equations well be replaced by Knicq’s equations!
gh
February 7, 2009 at 10:22 pm
ps: And I guess you have discovered nothing less than magnetic dipoles
gh
February 7, 2009 at 10:26 pm
gh: You have yet to know me better… I am far too ignorant to know anything to do with equations – the kind you mention here, let alone have Maxwell’s equations replaced (I had to look up Maxwell’s equation lest you think I feign ignorance – my ignorance is real and pure). Even if I were not ignorant, possessed a love for equations and an ambition to have my equations replace others’, I would prove to be far too much of a procrastinator to manage the soon part in your hope.
It is a widely held belief in the Martians, and by extension the Burmese, that updating this blog is cataclysmic in nature. I leave it for them to figure out the equations too, and in the event if they choose to name the equations Knicq’s equations, who am I to complain?
I did discover Magnetic dipoles though – through your comment. So now I am curious, with all this mathematic background, just who does this blog have the honor of hosting?
knicq
February 8, 2009 at 1:44 am
I don’t doubt their belief but Martians would not be able to formulate. Just three weeks ago they were very happy after they discovered fire for cooking food.
gh
February 8, 2009 at 4:30 pm
Hi there,
Could you email me directly on anthony.permal@gmail.com
A new campaign for Pakistani youth has been started by a group of us and is gaining international support, I’d like to discuss it with you.
Best,
Anthony
Anthony Permal
February 12, 2009 at 5:42 pm
السلام علیکم بھائی ، میں تفصیل سے پڑھوں گی بلاگ اور پتہ ہے بھائی مجھے یاد آ رہا ہے کہ میں پہلے بھی یہاں آ چکی ہوں آپ کے نئے بلاگ پر شاید لیکن مجھے بہت دیر سے پتہ چلا اور یہ صرف میری نالائقی کی وجہ سے ہے ۔
بہت اچھا لگا آپ سے بات کر کے ، اپنی دعاؤں میں یاد رکھیے گا۔
شگفتہ
February 17, 2009 at 5:45 pm
lol lovely post
, damn I missed your blog 
Saadie
February 19, 2009 at 11:01 am
He he Saadie. You are too kind.
Do keep visiting… I am hoping to keep it alive now
knicq
February 21, 2009 at 2:01 am
Pot, this is kettle, you are black!
Meaning, you don’t get to say any more: “No fair, your blog doesn’t tell half of the story!”
Btw, glad to see you’re back on-form.
Owl
February 23, 2009 at 11:46 am
Kettle, this is pot. I have just been around you.
As for me being back in form, lets hold that judgment until this blog gets all warmed up and the activity level surges to a frantic four a month eh?
knicq
February 23, 2009 at 3:20 pm